Tuesday, May 17


I don't know what I was thinking. For some reason I thought that it would be a good idea to take Piper with me and my Mom to the Princess Diana exhibit. I mean they had the wedding dress on display. I will say that that God-awful poofy mess looked a lot less obnoxious in person.  Not that it mattered because it was Diana's and that's all I need. My friends have often wondered about my affection for Diana since according to them I "don't have reverence for anything." Basically here's the short version. My Mom dragged me out of bed at 5 am in 1981 to watch the wedding, and I made myself get up at 5 am in 1997 to watch her funeral.
I can't explain it except to say that there is just something about a real, live princess. It's just that simple. So when I heard that the Diana exhibit was coming, I had to go. I figured that my Mom should also go since she technically started all this Diana stuff. Then I had the brain storm to include Piper so that she could see a princess that didn't have anything to do with Disney. I know what you're thinking, not such a good idea, and you are right.

While my Mom and I were crying at the wedding dress, Piper ran in front of us screaming "there's more!" Although, she did watch the home movies for a long time, but that's only because she's addicted to anything on a screen. We finally gave in to the fact that a four-year-old + exhibit = bad idea, and took turns corralling her while the other one blubbered over funeral footage. Toward the end I just let my Mom (and everyone else that shelled out $23.50) enjoy the exhibit in peace while I sat with Piper and played My Little Pony. Mind you this was after I pried her off the computer that was designed to let visitors sign a remembrance book online and not to play Max and Ruby.

Since the Diana "experience" was technically my Mother's Day present to my Mom, we decided to have lunch at the restaurant next to the exhibit. After we ordered, I noticed that we were surrounded by a lot of go-getting business types dressed in tweed. We were sitting right next to a table full of them and their business speak, you know "think out of the box" and all that jazz.

Piper was actually now behaving beautifully since she had eaten and was given full access to her My Little Pony's. That's why what happened next was so odd and hi-larious. The business dudes sitting next to us ran into a couple of business friends that came by to say "harrumph, harrumph." Anyway, one of the guys was standing with his back to us. He was wearing a brown tweed suit that I guess was too tempting to Piper, because the next thing I knew I saw her reaching out for the jacket bottom with her thumb and pointer finger. I knew what she was doing, but it took my mind a few seconds to process. I thought "is she grabbing his butt?" And then I thought "hey, is she grabbing his butt?!"

By the time realized that she was actually going to touch this man, she'd already tugged at the bottom of his tweed jacket. It was like she was testing the quality of the fabric or something. The only I could say was "What are you doing?" She looked just as surprised  as I did, and she responded "I don't know." It was like the tweed entranced her and she couldn't help but touch it.  I expect that reaction out of something pink and sparkly, but brown and beige, not so much. Maybe she was just curious as to what exactly this strange matching jacket and pant combination was since she's never seen one before because her father flat-out refuses to buy a suit.

What confuses me more, is that during the entire Diana exhibit she didn't give any of the dresses a second glance. Oh sure she screamed "LOOK AT THE RED ONE," or "THERE'S A BLACK ONE," at the top of her lungs, but none of the historic Versace gowns piqued her curiosity. Even the wedding dress, with its 25-foot long train and gold antique crown was yawn-worthy to Piper. But put a tweed jacket in front of her and she is helpless to stop herself from caressing the scratchy material. 

Maybe I've underestimated my daughter, it's quite possible that she's fooled me with all the pink and ruffles. Maybe she only likes the fairy tale princess because she can manipulate the end past "happily ever after." I for one enjoy watching Cinderella hang out with Barbie and Jesse, listening as they're told "honey, get in the car!" Besides, it's a better ending than the real one got.